Thursday 9 November 2017

Bullying - whose problem?

One day this week, I was cycling past the high school on my way to pick up Isabella from Kindergarten when I saw two boys in the cycle park.  By this time school was finished, most of the students had left school and there weren't many people around.

One boy had the other in a headlock and they were struggling.  As a teacher, I often see children 'playing' in this way and I know that I am too likely to boss strangers about based on my job.  I often have to remind myself in public that these loud/naughty/inconsiderate teenagers are neither my children nor my pupils and because of that I almost carried on past these boys on this particular day. 

Then I heard the boy in the headlock cry out and I realised, this isn't just two kids messing about, it's one child hurting another and while they're still not my responsibility, if another child did that to one of my children, I'd want the stranger on a bike to do something. 

I stopped and asked the boy to let the other one go.  He claimed it was just a bit of fun but the victim said otherwise.  I repeated my request and as another woman came by from the car park and also confronted the boy, he let go and left.

Part of me wishes I had done more, part of me thinks more would have been overkill and possibly caused more problems for the victim.  However, the whole incident stuck with me somehow.  It made me realise more than ever that parenting changes you in so many ways and gives you a whole new perspective.

Bullying is never going to go away unfortunately but it's something to which I never want to turn a blind eye. The whole incident reminded me of this post from one of my favourite mummy-bloggers whose daughter stood up to bullying in an incredibly brave way.  That's how we should be bringing up our children and it starts here and now.

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